Soaked… and it’s not raining

Chiang Mai. North of Thailand and its second-biggest city. And also reckoned as being the best place for Songkran. If by “best” you mean “most likely to get soaked in”.

I’ve made one quick excursion into town and managed to get some flip flops, 2 Tintin t-shirts for Indy and no watch battery. Holy grail the last one, I think. Somehow I’m reaching the conclusion it’ll be easier to buy a cheap knock-off Cartier.

The “night market” starts setting up about 3pm and it’s essentially about 3 gazillion trolley stalls which get dragged around by people, motorbikes, vans… Well, roughly 3 gazillion. I lost count at 1.75 gazillion. They’re not careful with them. The screeches of metal on metal as they’re cannoned and dragged past each other is almost painful.

On the way back up, disaster. Two young(ish) Thai girls (probably early twenties) armed with a hose and two buckets struck. *SPLOOSH* being a good sport, I just let them. Heck, it’s only water. And I was outnumbered. Then their mum smeared some kind of powdery stuff on my face. Bizarre. I’ve heard they often use coloured powders, but this just looked like talcum only it smelled utterly different. More mediciney.

Anyway, they started arguing over which was going to be my girlfriend while I tried to soak them in return (successfully) and then I made good my exit, squishing up the street, trainers squirting water everywhere. I really should have changed into my flip-flops when I bought them.

There were a few Brits at the next pub throughfully throwing water at passing motorists who attempted to soak me too. I think I took the wind out of their sails when I pointed out that someone else had beaten them to it. Then cheered up when I told them where they could likely find some decent competition.

So I am now sat in my room with fresh clothing and flip flips on (which I shouldn’t really indoors but they are brand new), wondering how long it’ll take my clothes and money to dry out. This was why I packed football shirts. They dry very fast indeed!

One unfortunate thing is that I won’t be able to get any photos of the night market during my stay. I can’t risk taking my camera out during Songkran for obvious reasons. If I did get a cheap disposeable, I’d have to wait till I got the pics back and scanned them somehow.

I’m sure I’ll be back here someday, though. I can wait til then. In the meantime, I’m off on a walking trek tomorrow which includes bamboo rafting, elephant riding and a visit to one of the “long neck” tribes in the mountains. Oh, and some waterfalls. All for about £12 including lunch. Bargain.

Tiger pics not yet uploaded!

 
I was intending to get all the tiger pictures up today, but it seems that Fotopic isn’t in agreement with me. Their servers seem a little too busy and I can’t connect to upload.

However, the pictures are all sorted and waiting to be shoved up the wire. I’ll try again when I get in from the footie at the Bull’s Head. Or more likely in the morning when I’ve sobered up.

Boris, one of the guys I met at the Tiger Temple, turned up at the hostel I’m staying in earlier. Small world! If he’s back soon enough I shall encourage him to join me for dinner, though apparently he’s hoping for a date with a stewardess he hooked up with. Lucky man! Posted by Picasa

UPDATE: Tiger Temple pics (120 of them) now available at http://mosh.fotopic.net.

All Buddha’d out

 
Today there was a lot of walking in a lot of sunshine. My forearms are now bronzed like those of a Greek god. Unfortunately, my nose and head are as red as a baboon’s bottom and my legs as white as a pint of milk (which incidentally, you can’t seem to buy here).

I went with Prashant, a lad from India in my dorm who’s been to Singapore recently. I have to watch what I say around him as he’s a lawyer by trade. He thought Singapore a fine city. “They have a fine for everything. A fine for chewing gum, a fine for spitting, a fine for jaywalking…”

He’s also spent some time on the beaches further south and has recommended somewhere to stay in Phuket which I may well use if I head down there in a week or so. That all depends on those forms coming through from my lawyer. In honesty, I’d rather head for Vietnam while I have plenty of time on my visa!

Back to the touristy stuff. Mainly, this was to see some of those things that “if you go to Bangkok, you have to see…”. So I’ve seen ’em now. And they’re big. And impressive. And in their own way beautiful.

To get to them, the easiest method is Skytrain to the end of the line (Saphan Taksin). You then board a local or tourist ferry and get off at pier 8 (13Baht), double back on yourself and get a dinky ferry for 3Baht to the other side of the river.

Here you will find Wat Arun (entrance fee 20Baht). It’s a fairly large structure, decorated in pieces of broken china and crockery. It glistens in the strong sunshine and is obviously the result of some painstaking work. However, I couldn’t help but think “bling”.

Back over the river and a walk up the road gets you to the Grand Palace, the king’s incredibly opulent residence (well – one of them) which also includes a huge temple area (Wat Phra Kaeo). On the way up, I encountered my first handful of potential tourist fleecers.

I’d read about these, so knew what to expect as soon as they started talking. The signs at the Palace even warn “Do Not Trust Strangers”. What they do is walk up to you and ask where you’re going. Then where you’re from and how long you’ve been in Bangkok. They pick up on the newbies and then say they know someone from where you live and could you do them a favour?

The more gullible tourist then ends up in a gem shop buying cheap crap for 10 times what it’s worth on the promise they can get it home and sell it for a fortune as they’re getting a bargain. Again, the old rule applies – if it seems to good to be true…

I found the best way to get rid of them without being too rude was to tell them I’d been in Bangkok for 6 months and that I lived here. You can physically see their faces change when they hear that and they walk off.

Back to the Palace. It’s 250Baht to get in, which includes entry to the temple area, a coin and jewellery museum, 2 weapon museums and a museum about the Wat Phra Kaeo. You also get a ticket valid for 7 days for 3 other attractions, though I’ve no idea where they are!

The temple area’s the first to be entered and if I thought Wat Arun was “blingy”… there was enough bling here to satisfy a whole 5 generations of chavs. Huge gold structures, more gold leaf over here, gold embossed something else over there. Massive statues of gods and demons.

My personal highlight was a scale model of the Angkor Wat, about 10 metres square, located outside one of the buildings. Also, there’s a huge mural running for hundreds of metres around the innner walls of the courtyard, telling stories from early Thai days.

The main temple area contains the Emerald Buddha (who’s actually made of jade). He was wearing his summer outfit (there are three and they are changed each season in a big ceremony), sat atop a very high plinth sourrounded by more bling. I mean, this place made your average Bradford taxi driver’s parcel shelf look positively tame.

The Emerald Buddha was discovered by a monk hundreds of years ago who thought he was just a normal buddha statue until the plaster cracked and revealed the green stone. He mistakenly thought it was emerald and the name stuck. At one point in the country’s history, a Laotian prince was asked to take the throne in Siam (Thailand’s old name) as there was a gap in the pattern of ascension. When he left to take his rightful throne in Laos, he took the buddha with him. Many years later, the two countries warred and victorious Thailand recovered the statue.

Buddhas in all positions, standing, sitting, cross legged, palms facing you… And all in solid gold. It was just rather overbearing, to be honest. Prashant is a Buddhist, so obviously it meant more to him than to me, but I just felt that the excessive “goldiness” actually cheapened the appearance of the place for me. I hate to say it, but it looked tacky.

The skill and craftwork involved in the building structures themselves, though, was beyond reproach. Carving and casting done to perfection.

We moved on to the palace grounds in the baking heat. Again, opulence was the watchword. Huge amounts of intricate work and massive, overbearing structures. Soldiers were stood at attention in pristine white uniforms (not a job I’d fancy in that heat), guarding certain entrances.

We wandered round both of the weapons museums (ancient and modern). At both, the guard on duty at the entrance was asleep!

It took us a little over two hours to plod around the grounds, and we then headed down the road to Wat Pho – the home of the enormous reclining Buddha.

Entry was 20Baht and the grounds were – as expected – beautiful. Some fanstastic oversized water features caught my eye as we went into the main hall holding the Buddha. It’s huge. Both tall and long.

The bit that struck me as bizarre was the fact that you can walk past the Buddha’s feet. Now, you’re not meant to point the soles of your feet at anyone in Thai culture (or, indeed, at any image of Buddha) – it’s very rude. Yet, this Buddha has huge feet at one end that point directly at anyone walking past. They’re inlaid with mother of pearl decorations, so maybe this has something to do with it.

Around the back of the Buddha are 100 or so bowls, one for each monk who cares for the temple. The idea is to hand over some cash to someone who will in return give you 100 Baht in 1 Baht coins. You place one coin in each bowl. There’s a near continuous “clanking” as you walk around while people do just this.

We had a quick wander around the rest of the grounds and discovered another temple with more Buddha statues in. By that point I’d decided I’d seen enough Buddhas to last me a lifetime.

Back to the boat, the skytrain and a short stopoff at Siam Paragon to drool over the Lambos and Ferrari Enzo in the “posh car” area. Next, the Bulls Head (where else?) for some great food and 8 loing tickets for the “open the box” competition. Ah well. I’ll be back there on Sudnay for the Boro game.

No plans for Saturday at all. I have a couple of postcards to write and need to walk up to Joy and Nacho’s to make sure they have my email addres to tell me when/if those documents ever arrive. Aside from that, just chilling and reading! I’d rather be doing it by a pool or on the beach though!

Today I have mostly been…

…sat in dark rooms watching films. And being smeared in oil and massaged by a small Thai woman. Well, it had to happen eventually. You can’t go to Bangkok and not get a massage!

I wasn’t brave enough to go for a traditional Thai massage. Apparently they’re somewhat like an assault from a burly 7-foot chiropractor. I was more in the mood for letting my head cold dribble out through my nose while I was rubbed down and chilled for a while.

It worked. My cold’s a fair bit better, though I was hoping for a bit more of a hard massage. I’ve been warned not to ask them to be too hard, though, as they have incredibly strong hands and can really apply pressure when they want!

A word of warning (thanks, Tim) – always aim for somewhere advertising “traditional” massage. You’re much less likely to be asked if you want “happy finish”. No more details on this family-friendly forum *ahem*.

The films I caught were Ultraviolet which was very comic-booky. I don’t know if it’s based on a comic or not, though the opening titles give the impression it is. It’s somewhat like V For Vendetta meets Blade with tons of silly special effects of varying quality. The helicopters in one of the opening scenes look like they were made for TRON.

Second up was Pink Panther and, in fairness, it wasn’t bad. Mainly spoiled by the kid behind me kicking my chair, climbing up my chair, pushing my chair forward for minutes at a time with his feet and yattering at his dad for ages every time someone got hurt in the film.

Steve Martin makes a half-decent Clouseau, though some things have changed from the classic films. The main one is the sad omission of Cato. Instead, Jean Reno plays a “straight fiddle” to Martin and Clouseau attacks him randomly. Either way, the early originals are definitely better but as a modern remake it’s not too bad.

My Chaing Mai problems seem to be sorted (touch wood). After AsiaRooms.com got back to me again to tell me that the room I was under the impression was booked last night wasn’t available, but as an alternative they had… the same hotel. I contacted them and it was a posher room at twice the price so I told them to shove it.

Next stop was hostelbookers.com which had rooms in 3 hostels available for the period I wanted and all nice places. Only their web site seems to be broken. When you click on “BOOK NOW” it loops back to the page asking you where you want to stay. Argh. An email to them got me a response saying they couldn’t find any accomodation for me for that time period.

So on to HostelWorld where I found a very nice B&B for a tenner a night with free wireless internet in all the rooms, about 10 mins walk from the night bazaar. OK, so it’s not the hotel with a pool that I really wanted, but I may head beachwards the following week so I can live with that. This booking has also been confirmed and guaranteed so I know I have somewhere to stay!

Unfortunately, I have to end today’s post on a very, very sad note indeed. A friend of mine back home, very close to my own age, has passed on. He’s had a long history of heart problems, but has battled through years of treatment without a single complaint and with a wonderful sense of humour. My sympathies go out to Nic, his fiancèe, and his family.

The world won’t be the same without you, Bob. Fewer sailors will be blushing at your abuse of the English language, and the air will be less blue! 🙂

First of the piccies

 
A fair few of you will have had this one by email, but I’m popping it on here partly to test the Picasa software I’ve downloaded. It’s probably the pick of the bunch from my first visit to the temple with Lou last week.

I’m going to upload a larger selection of the rest over the next day or two, seeing as I now have more spare time than I was expecting. I’ll announce them on here with a link to the relevent gallery. Given the time and freedom I had, especially around the back of the canyon area, I’ve got some fantastic shots of the cubs and adults playing in the water.

Of course, I’d have loved to spend another three days going mad with the camera, but it was not to be! Posted by Picasa